Brokenness

Posted on February 15th, 2008

Last night, my wife and I sat on the couch enjoying a relaxing evening in front of the TV, watching some of our favorite shows that we had recorded in the last week. We finished the last one we were going to watch for the night, and the TV switched over to the regular TV stations. It happened to be tuned into CNN, which was showing Anderson Cooper 360. And, rather than the obligatory coverage of the tight Democratic primary race, or the changes in New Orleans since the show’s last visit to the city (Anderson Cooper was on site in N.O.), the show was showing breaking news coverage on the shooting spree that happened inside a lecture hall at Northern Illinois University yesterday.

The two of us just sat numbed, in shock. It can’t be good when such stories have become routine, when the images of people fleeing for their lives is as normal in real life as it is inside the suspended disbelief of a movie theater. What is it that has happened in the last ten or fifteen years that has brought us to the point of wondering whether colleges could ever be safe, whether a trip to a mall for a day out could ever be relaxing again, whether any public place is really safe again. I know many places in the world deal with this, and have dealt with this for long years. But it’s new here, to me.

I wonder what we can do for my generation and the one after (those born post 1975) to curb the pain, the frustration, the loss of grounding that is spinning us out of control. It’s not for want of the knowledge of the message those of us who follow Christ know we need to share. There’s something else missing. Whether it is what we are saying, how we are saying it, or some other thing, I don’t know. Publishing houses make money off of those arguing to figure it out. But something has to change. Our ministry as a church must change and meet the needs of those who are hurting and broken. We aren’t doing it now.

Tags: Current Events, Generations, Ministry
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Change

Posted on February 13th, 2008

It has been a year and a half since I began ministering here in New Jersey. Hard to believe it has been that long. Hard to believe it has only been that long.

When I interviewed for the position, I was told that part of my duties under the worship half of my job description would be to transition the church from organ-led traditional worship to a blended style of worship that includes organ/traditional music and other instrument/contemporary worship. (Caveat: I don’t think that an organ necessitates traditional or can’t be contemporary, but it certainly is not done in my current context, and I can’t exactly imagine “Blessed Be Your Name” from an organ.) I had made significant headway in that area at the previous congregation I served, so I was not intimidated by such a task. Taking a cue from an adjunct professor from seminary, I declared my intention to not introduce change until I had observed the church for a year.

The year was up last August, and, on cue, I began introducing new songs. At a board meeting in December, the discussion about the pace of change came up, and the general consensus was that things were not happening fast enough. The impression was that the congregation wanted more, more, more. So I revved things up quite a bit and started introducing more new music.

So this month, at another board meeting, the general consensus was that I am going to fast. Too much new. Too quickly. And I just find that ironic.

Generally, I like to introduce a song and sing it three weeks in a row, and then continue for a few additional weeks with familiar songs before introducing the next new song. I thought that is what I was doing. And I said so at the board meeting. I wanted further instruction on where the middle road was between the “not enough” of December and the “too much” of February. This morning I went back through all of the orders of service since August and reviewed what we have sung when, and how often. Turns out I haven’t been doing such a good job with my intended approach for introducing new songs. That’s what I get for being high and mighty and thinking that I know best automatically.

Nothing like a kick in the pants to get you back to where you need to be. Or should I say, get me back to where I need to be?

Fortunately, the church really does want the change. I’m thankful for a community that is willing to walk along the path together, and even follow someone who stumbles along, such as me.

Tags: change, Ministry, Music
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Pressing on

Posted on February 8th, 2008

I just reread my last post…written three months ago now.

Thanksgiving, Christmas, and our annual church business meeting have all come and gone and my ministry seems to have been largely unaffected by those events back in November. I consider myself very blessed to be in the community of faith in which I minister. The people proved to be very understanding. Large numbers of the congregation came up to me to encourage me by their own tales of having to face professional councils or exams multiple times to be certified for their careers. It was a relief.

We may have another go at the ordination thing come late spring. We’ll see…other things may get in the way of that. Initially, I piled up large stacks of books from my library to help me rework my ordination paper and retool my arguments. But they have mostly gathered dust. Orders of service, choir selections, Sunday school classes, and the many other details of ministry have come to the forefront, as it should be.

In the end, I am pretty sure that I just pushed too quickly. I brought up the idea for the ordination council, even though I have long believed that ordination is a function of the church, not the minister. Therefore, it should be the church that presses the issue, not me. And there are many other things that I pushed through that I probably would not do the same way, and would have regretted had the ordination gone through. God is gracious, even in the muck and mire of misery. Family, friends, and congregation members all hold me and my wife up in their prayers, and the effects are noticeable. I am not nearly as bitter as I thought I would be, and that is a blessing all to itself.

I hope to get back to writing more. Thanks for your prayers, whoever reads this.

Tags: Church & Theology, Life, Ministry
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When the church says no

Posted on November 13th, 2007

I faced an ordination council today. I spent three and a half hours addressing my salvation experience, call to ministry, preparation for ministry, view of ordination, and doctrinal statements. I answered questions from how Jesus fulfills the three roles of prophet, priest, and king to whether or not Jonah really spent three days inside the belly of a fish to whether or not I doubted or questioned the salvation experience I had when I was eight years old.

About an hour into it, I had a pretty strong sense of how it was going to go. After the council deliberated in their executive session, they called me back in for the verdict:

• They sensed clearly my call to ministry
• They sensed clearly that I am gifted for ministry
• They sensed clearly that I exhibit godliness

But

• They were concerned that I did not defend my doctrinal statements from Scripture

Therefore

• The council recommended that I not be ordained at this time.

So question:

• Joe Churchmember has essentially just been told that I am not currently fit for ministry. How do I minister to him and his family? How to I continue to pick out the order of service and seek to construct the education ministry of the church when a council of like-minded pastors thinks I am doctrinally undeveloped and/or immature for ministry?

It is all fresh – the council only ended about three hours ago, so I am sure I talk out of deep-seated emotions that a more rational and calm state of mind will soothe. But I am concerned for my ability to be an effective minister in this church. We’ll have to see how the church responds in the coming days.

Tags: Ministry
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Bibliology

Posted on November 12th, 2007

I’m facing a council tomorrow whose purpose is to determine my fitness for ordination. As part of that, I’m working through a number of theological issues that haven’t been dusted off since seminary, trying to figure out what my position is and how I will state it.

Take bibliology, for example. Bibliology is the branch of theology that deals with scripture. I minister at an independent Baptist church, one that is conservative in theology. Part of that theology takes a standard line in conservative, fundamentalist evangelical lingo: the Word of God/Scripture/Bible is inerrant in the original manuscripts.

Now, I can’t tell you the history of the belief in inerrancy. I’m sure I studied it at some point, and I’m positive that one of my dictionaries, systematic theologies, or tomes on Scripture can inform me if I so desire. But I do understand why inerrancy is such a big deal to so many people. Inerrancy gives a foundation for faith. It says that, as much as the Bible we have matches what was originally written whenever the first manuscript of Zephaniah was composed, it is God’s Word with no mixture of error of any kind, and we can then say that (insofar as it matches the original) it speaks utter and complete Truth – on matter as varied as faith, science, philosophy, and psychology, to name a few. The original manuscripts, then, become the base foundation for anything and everything someone believes. And if you take away inerrancy, then it jeopardizes the entire faith system that was built on that foundation.

Inerrancy is a big faith issue in the circles in which I minister.

And I have a problem in that I don’t believe in inerrancy; at least not the kind of inerrancy that I was taught in college and seminary. I don’t believe that basing our faith on a set of non-existent documents (those original autographs inerrantists love to tout) is a God-honoring placement of our faith.

I choose instead to put my faith in God. I choose to believe that God has used the process by which we have received the Scriptures that we use today in order to identify, communicate, and preserve His word. Rather than basing my faith on saying that God whispered in David’s ear the words to Psalm 23, I would argue that God chose Psalm 23 to communicate something about Himself, whatever the process that was used to place Psalm 23 in the Bible that I use on a regular basis. It may be that God whispered in David’s ear. Or that David sat in a zombie state while the Spirit moved His hand to write out the Hebrew letters of Psalm 23. Or that God used a group of temple priests to examine some of the writings of the illustrious King David and revealed to them the great value of a particular song of David’s that eventually got placed as the 23rd song in a collection of hymns useful for Israelite worship.

The point isn’t HOW God chose the psalm, but rather THAT God chose the psalm of David that begins, “The LORD is my shepherd.” God chose it and uses it to communicate to His people something about Himself, or to comfort them, or to bring them peace, or to lead them to salvation. It’s not in the how. It’s in the that.

Tags: Church & Theology, Ministry, Scripture
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